I’ve wanted to teach witchcraft since I started on my path over 20 years ago.
I felt this deep soul calling that this is what I supposed to be doing. I daydreamed of it constantly, wishing for it every new moon. I’ve done so much journaling, shadow work, quantum leaping, pulling cards, and building business after business hoping that the next one would be the one that stuck.
I’ve failed more times than I’ve succeeded. But I wasn’t ready yet, and I think deep down I knew it. Does this resonate?
pivoting with the universe
I lost my job on a Monday morning in the middle of April.
A job that I knew wouldn’t be a forever thing, but it had been my career for over a decade, and it was what I needed at the time. It paid my bills, and that’s no small thing. I was good at it, but it never fulfilled me. Not really.
Staying at my day job was keeping me stuck and allowing me to play small. It was much easier to dream of one day making my dreams come true than it was to actually put the effort in to make it happen. When my dreams stayed dreams, I couldn’t fail.
The Universe must’ve been listening to my daily visualizations for years and finally said “here, you want it so bad? Prove it.”
WHAT YOU THINK YOU NEED VS WHAT YOU ACTUALLY NEED
I kept dreaming of what it would be like, but I wasn’t taking the necessary steps to build in a sustainable way. I can lie to myself and say that in trying to build a business 5 or so times, that I was learning, and it some ways I was. But when overnight success didn’t happen for me, I’d give up.
It was bigger than wanting it and then making it happen. While I was daydreaming of my success, I was simultaneously ingraining that I wasn’t ready yet.
I wasn’t truly ready to own showing up for others, let alone myself. I wasn’t comfortable in front of a camera, let alone my own skin. Despite all my shadow work, there was still way more to do around my authenticity and my abundance mindset.
While knowing who you are ahead of time certainly makes it easier, it ignores the fact that you will continue to grow and expand as you go. Who I am currently is not who I was in April, and not who I will be next week, or next month.
You probably have your intention mapped out, and you think you know what work you need to do to get there or maybe you’ve made past attempts and don’t know why you keep hitting roadblocks. There is likely more, or different, kinds of work you need to do to feel prepared. Often, the best way you find out what you truly need, is to trust that it will unfold along the way.
IT’S GOING TO LOOK DIFFERENT THAN YOU EXPECT
I never expected the start of Hillcrest to be slapped together on a random Tuesday with no plan in place. I always envisioned a smooth build up (with no bumps in the road, of course) where everything goes according to a plan I hadn’t actually figured out yet. Then, one day I would put in my two weeks’ notice because working at my day job was getting in the way of all the success I was building here.
Despite best laid plans, you need to be ready to give it all up to the Universe or the algorithm or some other outside influence. You won’t always predict what’s going to resonate and you can’t foresee every misstep in the journey, so don’t bother trying. That doesn’t mean you can’t have a plan but be ready for the Universe to lead you to places you don’t expect.
Even if, miraculously, everything goes according to plan, no matter how detailed we imagine our manifestations to be, reality hardly ever matches up exactly.
PERFECTION IS A DIRECTION, NOT A DESTINATION
I’m a perfectionist (hello Virgo moon stellium). I want everything to be done exactly right the first time, every time. Not only is that completely unrealistic and unachievable, but it also deprives me of the journey it takes to manifest my intentions. I miss out on learning the lessons, making the mistakes, and experiencing the unexpected. Don’t let the desire for perfection hold you back from progressing at all.
Stop waiting for the right conditions. When I started building my business I always waited until I had the perfect name, colour scheme, the entire branding finalized. I put so much effort into building and none into the doing. This time, I started because I had to. It was now or never. I didn’t have time for perfect.
It’s easy to self-sabotage. Especially if you spend time comparing someone’s day 200 to your day one. It’s easy to feel like other people have everything figured out when you’re just starting, but they had to go through the same periods of discovery. The only difference is they didn’t stop. Consistently showing up, ready to fail but hoping to succeed, can help you persevere.
There’s never going to be a perfect time to start. Even with all the most advantageous cosmic portals and magickal timing in place, they’re still just tools. It’s more important to decide to start than to wait for ideal conditions to appear.
No matter what you want to manifest, you can’t be afraid to go for it. Make the plan and take the first step. Then, keep showing up. Do it messy. Do it scared. Do it tired. Do it better next time. But don’t stop doing it because it can be your “one day” or your “day one”.
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